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First, a little clarification...

I realized that the way I phrased it when I said that I missed waking up to [JC's] his face, not only did it sound selfish, but it sounded shallow. I did not actually mean the way he "looks", I meant that I miss the happiness and confidence that is in that picture. I love this guy too much to care about what he actually looks like anymore. I mean, of course, I think he's hotter than anything, but even if his bruises were permanent, I would still love him.

I spent all day yesterday at his house. We slept, and then ordered pizza, and then I watched him play a video game. Yes, I am a weird girlfriend that actually likes to do that. Then I took the titches out of his eye. They were starting to fall out on their own, so I just clipped and pulled. It was actually kind of cool. I told him they looked like they were ready to come out a couple of days ago. Then I drove him over to my house while I went to pick up Gabby and his medication.

The day before when I picked up Gabby at my mom's, there were the loudest frogs you have ever heard outside on her patio. I was scared to death. (my most irrational, greatest fear in life is frogs) So, last night it was raining, and I just knew those frogs would be out and ready to get me. So, I called my mom, and told her to just send Gabby outside..and oh, could I borrow Star Wars. At which point I did try walking up her driveway...and there it was...it jumped away from me! The ugliest, brownest, toad you have ever seen. I screamed. My mom said, "Oh, Elizabeth.....(she used my full name)!" I was terrified. Paralyzed with fear. I kept saying, "Please, Mommy!, help me!!!" Yea, it's got to be bad when I start saying MOMMY! Maybe I should be hypnotized or something. This fear is getting out of control.

Speaking of fear. JC freaked out a little bit when we were driving to my house at night. He was kind of ok when we drove to the doctor's office the other day in the daytime. He said something about feeling more comfortable if there were more people than just me with him. It's just going to take a while to get over that feeling I guess. I've had my wallet stolen about 10 times. I've had my car broken in to about 6 or 7. And I know how violated and angry I felt every time. But, can you imagine that happening with violence? It's got to be really hard. And I just feel helpless. There's nothing I can say or do

Comments

Jacq said…
It is such a horrible feeling to have been violated. My purse was stolen five years ago and I still get paranoid about it. It took three months for me to get everything straightened out with my bank account and credit card company.

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