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Ugh!

I guess I should get some of what happened today out, but I just don't seem to have the words for it. Does that make sense. I saw him today. I talked to him yesterday, and we made arrangements to do the whole "giving stuff back" thing today. He borrowed his roommates car to come over here...and I don't know how I feel. It wasn't good or bad, or either. It was calm and it was emotional all at the same time. The A&M football jersey that is his "pride and joy"...he said he was thinking that I should keep it...he wanted me to have it...I just don't know what to say. Nothing has changed...it was just more a goodbye...I don't know...It definitely wasn't "good", but it wasn't bad. And I feel relieved or better...maybe those aren't really the words I'm looking for, but I don't know if I feel that way because I had another "JC fix" or because I just cried so hard that I have that after crying your eyes out feeling, ya know? He cried, too...hard...I guess it's time to really start telling myself to move on instead of dwelling on it so much. It's gonna hurt and I'm gonna be sad, but that's ok, right? And I'll be ok? I'll be OK...

Comments

Jacq said…
I know how you feel! Dwelling on things is the worst feeling ever. You seem to be doing pretty well under the circumstances. Good for you! You know what they say, "When one door closes, another door opens..."
You know, Liz, sometimes you just have to let go and let things be and see what happens. It hurts like hell, but I totally believe in the cheesy saying about "if you love someone, set them free" and all that jazz. If it really is meant to be something, things will come together.
Jacq said…
Listen to us with all these sayings! Ha Ha. Jess and I are experienced mamas. We know what we is talkin bout. ;P
I love hearing from you guys! You've made my day on occassion, and you have no idea how much I appreciate it!

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