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Ok, so this will actually probably be my last post of the week...

I haven't made it to the gym yet, but I've eaten the way I'm supposed to for the last two days, and I can already tell a difference. My jeans were a little bit looser this morning, and I just feel better. I haven't stuffed myself, and I don't feel like I have grease flowing out of my pores. This girl that works with JC (She plays Lilo from Lilo and Stitch) is going to be moving right down the street from me, and her complex has a fitness center, so JC and I talked about how cool it will be that we could possibly be able to work out together. Poor guy, he let me foam roll him and stretch him out yesterday...he was dying, but when I was done, he agreed that it makes you feel ten times better.

I don't know what's going on at the daycare that Gabby goes to before and after school, but I'm going to find out, and I'm a little upset. Gabby is very friendly and she's very sweet, and she has this uncanny way of making friends and becoming a "leader" in a group without being bossy. However, everyday that I've dropped her off this week I've watched her through the window as I'm leaving, and she seems so lost. I can tell that the older boys are being mean to her, and she has mentioned something about it. My kid is being bullied!!! I can't stand the thought of anyone being mean to her! She's told me a couple of times about how a couple of those boys have called her names and actually hit her. She of course tells the teacher, and I guess they get in trouble, but it continues to happen! So, my advice to her was that if she told the teacher, and it still happened, she should turn around and pop them one, or kick them as hard as she can in the leg, and if she gets in trouble, I'll take care of it! I know, they probably like her, and are being mean, isn't that what all of our parents told us when boys were mean to little girls? I feel so detached from her. Being a single parent just isn't fair. There are absolutely no resources in this damn country to help out! Her dad gets to be the good guy, and I get to be the bad guy all the time. And, if I were to mention this to her father, he would just say, "Well, this is the way you wanted things. I could be there helping you out!" I guess that's sort of true, but things were a lot worse when he was around as far as emotional stability. But, he did help out. There was someone to play with her when I couldn't. Now, I just feel like I'm so busy disciplining her or making sure the laundry gets done, that I don't have the time to play with her, to talk to her. And, I think that's what she really needs right now - someone to talk to. I don't want her to lose her confidence and self-esteem at this early of an age. She still has so much more to get through once she reaches junior high. But if she's being bullie at school, and she feels like she's being bullied at home by me, what else will she thing besides that she isn't worth anything? I've got to make more time for her. The laundry can wait, so can the dishes, and so can JC. The time and my daughter have just been slipping by me because of school and work and other stuff for the last couple of years. I was a much better parent when she was little, and her dad lived with us. I need to be more involved. There just seems like so many things that I NEED to do right now! ARRRRGGGHHHH! I'm definitely feeling overwhelmed this morning! But it's the weekend...time for me to relax, clear my mind, and start over when she comes home from her dad's on Sunday night.

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