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First Day

This was my horoscope today...Throughout today, you will feel the impact of past actions very strongly -- this could include both pleasant memories and unpleasant ones, so be prepared for pangs of melancholy to pop up here and there. There is no going back, so do not succumb to feelings of regret -- which is a waste of emotion. Know that these negative experiences helped you learn some very important lessons. Take a philosophical approach and carry on.

I have to say first that this blog is not going to turn into an Elizabeth crying over JC saga/fest the way it did the last time this little kid decided to screw me over. I don't have time for "slummin'" in my life anymore. I don't have time for someone who gets afraid and panics over his own inadequacies of not being able to grow up. And I don't have time to deal with someone who doesn't understand that relationships don't say in the "getting to know you phase". Twice now...when I was sick...and now that I was starting a new job...he wasn't there when I needed him the most...when things were hard. I'm moving on and up...and he'll remain the same...and I know how much more I deserve, and I know that he would have never been able to live up to my standards...let alone just the standards for being a productive citizen. I mean what the hell is wrong with this guy? He's missing out on a lot, and he'll regret it really bad one day...and I feel sorry for whoever he's around when he really knows what he lost.

So...my first day at my new job. It pretty much sucked. It was very overwhelming. But...hey...I've gotten through a hell of a lot in my life. ALOT!!! And If one day I can look back at this, and say, "OMG!!! I made it!!!" I'll be proud. That day's not here, yet...but one day at a time.

Comments

Anonymous said…
You can do this. It will only get easier. I'm so proud of you. Hang in there!
5:38 PM
Jacq said…
You know we all got your back! Take it easy, honey.
6:01 PM
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