Everything is really good. Too good! I'm in panic mode a little bit. Waiting for the shoe to drop or something. I have never had anything in my life like this. This is exactly the kind of thing I run from because I don't think I deserve it. But, don't worry...I'm trying everyday to get control of myself and realize I do deserve it, and that maybe it won't end horribly...I've had a panic attack everyday this week. But I'm not going to run away. Even if it means I have a panic attack every single day until I can get used to this. If you've read this blog long enough, you know that with my past relationships I don't have a lot of trust, hope, faith, anything left in men...but I'm trying. I never do what's good for me. But I'm 31 years old damn! It's about time I do! I wish I could say more. Maybe I'll have to do the whole invite people to my blog privacy thing so I can.
Time to Share?
I have a huge crush. I have a huge crush on a man I've never met in person. I have a huge crush on a man who does things that are very cool. Yesterday in the mail I got the book that he sent me...the book that he wrote...a book about all of his travels and adventures. The more I read this book, the less confident I start to feel about this being a possible "match". I have no idea what I can offer this older, more sophisticated, more worldly man. The biggest adventures in my life are grappling with 18-year old freshmen for a parking space at school, finishing a set of push-ups and pull-ups at the gym, or wrestling my daughter to the ground for a bath. Maybe I can teach him all about Sponge-Bob Square Pants?
This is again one of those times where things seem too good to be true. The emails we send back and forth would suggest that there is a great interest and curiosity on both sides, and that something really good could possibly come from this!!! His ...
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