Everything is really good. Too good! I'm in panic mode a little bit. Waiting for the shoe to drop or something. I have never had anything in my life like this. This is exactly the kind of thing I run from because I don't think I deserve it. But, don't worry...I'm trying everyday to get control of myself and realize I do deserve it, and that maybe it won't end horribly...I've had a panic attack everyday this week. But I'm not going to run away. Even if it means I have a panic attack every single day until I can get used to this. If you've read this blog long enough, you know that with my past relationships I don't have a lot of trust, hope, faith, anything left in men...but I'm trying. I never do what's good for me. But I'm 31 years old damn! It's about time I do! I wish I could say more. Maybe I'll have to do the whole invite people to my blog privacy thing so I can.
What is the definition of love?
Some anonymous person asked me this in the 'comments section' many blogs ago. A hard one to answer...everyone has a different answer...I am slowly admitting to myself that I have never truly been in love...I have felt deep affection for people, and I have had my feelings manipulated, and I have definitely been in lust...But I honestly can say that I've never been in love on my own terms...I'm so ready to be swept completely off my feet...
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