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Care'N'Share

I can't believd sometimes that I thought life was so hard when I was in high school. When Jess and I used to go into the office and have Care'N'Share w/ Schwenk, Zook, and Morales. Life seemed so difficult back then. Like I would never make it past another day. And to think that those three gals were the age that I am now at that time. It kind of makes me feel guitly. Because life is so much harder now. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm tired of prentending. I can't. Nothing is working. I'm sorry. I've tried to be strong for a very long time now, and part of it is completlely true, but another part of it is a complete lie. I'm lost. I'm tired of pretending either way.

If you're serious Schwenk, I would love to come out and spend a weekend with you. With or without Gabby. I remember when Jess told me how in a difficult part of your life, you went out to their house, and just "FELT". I need to do that so badly. I love you, Jess, but you and I both know that you don't let me feel however I am feeling. You want me to be happy, and I love you for that. But sometimes I feel like I just really need a hand on mine to say, "I know." And, "It's ok. You'll be fine But in the meantime go ahead and cry." I need that alot! Even though I don't like to admit it. That hand on my head, petting my hair, that says, "It's ok what you're feeling, I understand Get it out. I'll be here." No one can stop this pain, and I don't expect that. I just wish I had someone in my life that said it would be ok if I took pity on myself and just got it all out for once. But, fortunatley or unfortunatley, I have a lot people who love me, and just think I should be ok. And that's great, but right now, I'm really NOT ok. God! I'm actually really drunk. Sorry!

I would love to be able to get away, but not get away and pretend everything is ok. So, if you're really seious, Schwenk, I would love to come out and see you!

Comments

Anonymous said…
Elizabeth-I'm SERIOUS. Get out here now. Or next weekend, or the next weekend. Come without Gabby this time--I do know how you feel. And Jess is right-the week I went out to Colorado is exactly what I needed to just get my head around my feelings. Come. I love you and it's ok to feel what you're feeling.
8:42 AM
Jessiedc28 said…
Ya! Get over to "Schwenks Sad Camp" because it's nothing but laughter and joy in Jess's camp, baby! We party til we drop over here. If you want me to hold your hand while your here I will, but only if the other hand has a drink in it!!! Yahoo!

xo,
J
4:59 PM
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