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Ahhh...the Cleansing

My day off. And what did I do? Yep, I cleaned. I mean CLEANED! Something that I quit doing. WoW! I really did let my life and my "self" go to complete shit for the last couple of years. And ultimately that was my fault in the end...I mean it was directly my fault, but indirectly it was because of Peter Pan Syndrome...I think you know what I mean. I've said it all before...I quit going to the gym, I quit tanning, I quit being a mom, I quit cleaning...and organizing which I've said before I'm a freak about organizing. So, today I finally got the last of the "shit" out of my apartment. It smells good...like me...it looks good...and I even rearranged stuff so that it would feel like a new start...new shower curtain (I told you I was a linen whore!)...hung up some new art...It's refreshing...and it was cleansing...theraputic...I cried a lot...but the good kind of crying...a release...

And I had the weirdest lunch....mini corndogs...and I made a mozarella ball and cherry tomato salad...love that! Oh, and a Sunkist, too.

Can't wait to see you all! I will be at Coyote Ugly as well as Dave and Buster's on Saturday. I thought I had a date for Friday night, but I think I'm gonna get stood up...anyway...if not, Armando Saldivar will be my date...he doesn't know where Coyote Ugly is and doesn't want to get lost, so he thinks I should just drive him, but that's our little secret!

I forgot to add that yesterday among all the great birthday wishes I also had a phone call from Mando, who just laughed at me for being old! I love that though...you can always count on your friends to make you feel good...or to put you in your place! But what the hell is he talking about, he's going to be 31 this year!!!!

I'm here at my parent's to pick up Gabby...my mom's been taking her to swimming lessons Mon - Thurs. She's looking great...tan and fit...and happy. I saw Ray Ray the Killer today...but he didn't have his game face on today...he was not so hard on me...He wasn't singing, "Toe Tag...or a Body Bag..." It's a little song he sings when he asks how I want to leave the gym. He's so freakin' funny. I've been having this pain behind my knee especially when I work out my hamstrings...Ray Ray thinks it might be tendinitis...it sucks, and hurts. Yuck! And can I just say...staggered squats blow!!! Hate, hate, hate them! They make everything hurt, even my feet...and if there's one place I REALLY can't stand pain...it's my feet! The end...I have to go home now and pick up just a few more things...I will be on my hands and knees scrubbing floors until bed time!

I have to apologize to you, my faithful friends and readers...I usually get pretty personal on this blog, and save the silly, doesn't really matter who reads it, blogs for my MySpace blog...but lately I've been lazy and just want to get some stuff out...so, I've been putting up the exact same blogs on both. But I do want to get back to being more personal on here, with you...I think I've been holding a lot in, not wanting to feel anything...or let anything out...I guess I've been feeling a little numb...but I want to share! Maybe I've just haven't felt safe letting any feeling out...I mean afterall, here recently my feelings have been pretty much trampled...but I want to get back to doing my lists, too...thinking good things, and trying to feel better! I went and saw a counselor yesterday...yes, on my birthday of all days!!! I'll put more on that next time! I'll save the good stuff just for you guys!

Comments

Jessiedc28 said…
There is a myspace blog? What am I? Meat? I've loved you longer than anyone... ur a trator and an old fart. Oh, loved the move recommendation.... muah muah muah.

Your Cuddly friend,
JJ

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