Dysfunction Suits Me

Feeling better. Thank freakin' goodness! I still have a bit of a cough, but feeling soooo much better. Glad I don't have swine flu. I was scared there for a minute. Junior high with Gabby is very interesting. In one week she has become a very different child. And, it's very challenging. Especially since this summer she spent a lot of time at her dad's, so this weekend she was home and it was especially challenging. It's so much fun, let me tell you. She is very vocal. She has a lot of really interesting things to say. A lot of which is followed by "FINE!", "OKAY!", "THAT'S NOT FAIR", or "GOD!" There's also a lot of foot stomping and door slamming. She also would like me to buy her everything in the world and when I don't I'm the"meanest mom EVER!". She might as well start calling me Mommy Dearest. Yesterday I bought her a cool rainbow colored studded belt from Hot Topic. And, yet, today

Been sick for about a week now. Went to the doc on Friday...he said it's bronchitis. I think it's swine flu. And, it just won't go away. All the meds they gave me make me sicker than when I don't take them...so, I'm not taking them. My other, regular, everyday meds are wrecking havoc on my appetite. I'm down about 15lbs. From not eating basically. Which, sounds really great seeing as how I could really stand to lose some weight. But, this is not the way I want to do it. Getting nauseous and wanting to puke at the sight of any food is not really all that fun. I really love food. I'd like to eat something. For the most part, I forget to eat between breakfast and dinner...and on the weekends...forget it. I don't want anything. I thought I was going to throw up on my desk this morning as I ate my eggs and potatoes. No, really. I was really scared I was going to have to take off running for the bathroom. That would have been embarrassing. P-D

So, they've adjusted my medication again. Double the dose of Prozac, which I'm very happy about. I have totally noticed a difference on Prozac like no other drug I've ever taken. Why didn't I try this sooner? Only drawback is, I no longer want to eat. Yesterday I had a bagel for breakfast and didn't eat again till around 7pm. Ridiculous. But, it's not like I'm starving. I could stand to lose a few. My ADHD meds have been switched from Focalin XR to Vyvanse. I could totally tell a difference yesterday. I was much more focused. It's so weird how basically taking meth calms me down.