Dysfunction Suits Me

SUMMER! I think it's officially summer. At least it is in San Antonio. Well, I thought it was yesterday. 93 degrees at 6pm, but I woke up this morning and it was windy and 70 degrees, which actually felt cold after the sauna that has been the last week. It makes me really happy though. I love summer so much. I could live with summer all year round. I love laying by the pool and baking...feeling the sweat roll off the back of my knees and down my calves, reading a good book, and being relaxed. The only time summer sucks is when I'm getting ready to go out at night, trying to blow dry the enormous amount of hair on my head, and sweating to death and feeling like I have to take another shower, but that can easily be fixed by turning the AC down to 60 before commencing the blow-drying. I'm on a total adrenaline rush this morning. I actually went and did cardio this morning...on a Saturday! I can't believe it myself!!! There's this awesome perfume oil at the GAP (I coul...

Return of the Beast Guess who was at the gym today? That's right...my very good and loyal original trainer Aaron the Beast...I think I might break into tears.

The Bagel Lady I've cut bagels out of my morning routine completely, but I'm still having a hard time giving up the coffee. This morning I walked into the bagel shop, and started getting my coffee, and there sat the lady who would make me question why some people are allowed to live! (just kidding) There's a new bagel lady who sits at the counter eating breakfast every morning before she starts her shift. I've always thought she was a little on the looney side. Today she had a conversation with me as I was filling up my coffee cup. Bagel Lady: What color is that on your hair? Me: What? Bagel Lady: What color is that on your hair? Me: It's my natural color?? Bagel Lady: Oh, your natural color. It's very pretty. Me: Thank you. Bagel Lady: But what color is it? Me: What? Bagel Lady: What color is your hair? Me: Ummmm...RED??? Bagel Lady: Oh, well, it's very pretty. And I think it's sandy brown.

Tears of Joy or Embarrassment? That's all Folks...I no longer have a trainer. I am now on my own...I am my own trainer. My sessions ran out, and I just can't afford to keep training even though I would LOVE to. Today was my first work-out all by myself. Ray Ray had written down a routine for me and had it ready when I walked in the gym, shook my hand, and sent me on my way telling me he'd be with me in spirit. I was very nervous and a little sad. It was very lonely not having someone to talk and laugh with. I also felt really really stupid. When I work out with a trainer I don't usually pay attention to the other people in the gym, and it seems like they're not paying attention to me. BUT...now that I was alone I just felt like people were gawking at me...well, it wasn't just a feeling...THEY WERE. I was the only girl in the "Heavy Weights" section...I was surrounded by big, burly, sweaty men. It was really hard to get through, but I did it. I so wish ...

I'm Here!!! I have to be in Florida for a family function at the end of June...So, of course my diet and gym routine is on over-drive. It's really hard to eat the same things over and over again...and I've gotten pretty good at this whole nutrition thing...so I've created my own menu. This recipe (believe me, I know...cheesy) is so freakin' good. I first had it Jessica's for Thanksgiving one year. She has lost the recipe though, so this is kind of for her too...Now I'm on this salad-a-week kick...this week (see below), next week a Greek salad, and the week after cheese tortellini pasta salad... Green Bean and Cherry Tomato Salad 1 1/2 lbs Green Beans (Snap Beans) 1 1/2 lbs Cherry Tomatos 1 tblsp Oregano (chopped) 1 tblsp Garlic (chopped) 2 tblsp Red Wine Vinegar 2 1/2 tsp Olive Oil 1/2 tsp Salt 1/4 tsp Ground Pepper I usually start by cleaning up the beans, cutting off their ends, and cutting them in half because they can be kind of long. Then you steam the ...

Am I Going To Die? I just got stung for the first time ever by a wasp . . . So far so good . . . I can still breathe, I haven't swelled up like a balloon, yet . . . But it hurts and itches like crazy!!! It's almost the end of the semester and I am completely swamped! Two projects, two papers, and three finals, all in the next 3 weeks . . . Somehow I'll handle it. I've actually all of sudden "woken up" where school is concerned. I've been in such a daze for like the last 7 or 8 months. The AOC has changed my life as I knew it . . . in good and bad ways!!! Bad because he takes up too much of my thoughts . . . and I need all the brain capacity that I can get!!! Somehow, after years of barely even talking to anyone at work, and only a couple of years of actually being a little more friendly with my co-workers, I seem to have been sucked up in "office politics" and I HATE it! I used to really like going to work . . . now I just want to quit!! It still...

Motley Fucking Crue This is where I was tonight with Josh. He bought us tickets because I really wanted to go and re-live my past? It was very sweet. Vince's voice was actually really good tonight despite what all of the articles said...I thought it was really great actually...so...it was lots of fire, lights, flying drum stunts, strippers on ropes, girls making out on stage, little people, girls on stilts,three hot guys, it was the loudest concert I have ever been to, and not because of the music, but because of the crowd, bloody movie clips and porno clips being played on the big screens, they did turn on the lights in the building so they could film girls flashing, the smell of pot circulating everywhere, smoke, and just lots and lots of screaming...I can barely hear...and I probably won't be able to talk tomorrow...but, all well worth it!!! I was pleasantly surprised, and felt like a giddy little schoolgirl...whatever..

Out of the mix? I have been a horrible blogger lately. I think about things I want to sit down and say, and I just never get around to it! Hamster Update: He' s so sick. He hasn't eaten or drank any water for a week now. I don't know what to do for him. I'm hesitant on giving him anything to help him out (Thanks, though, for the alcohol advice, K). But, I feel so bad for him. He just limps around. I don't even hear him at night anymore, which I thought used to annoy me, but now realize that it was somewhat comforting when I was falling asleep. How did I become attached to this hamster? Part of it is a little bit of sentimentality. I bought him with an ex and, well, I'm sure you get it. My class presentation was supposed to take place on Tuesday. My partner, Jason, and I were going to be last, but everyone else took so long, and we had like 5 minutes. So, we got up and Jason started talking...and kept talking...and the professor had to end it, and told us we coul...

Is this the end? I think our hamster is dying. He's acting really strange, lethargic, not eating or drinking, not sleeping in his usual spot, and breathing harder than usual. He is really freakin' old, and I've joked about how he's the "hamster that just won't die". Today though, I'm worried about him. I don't want him to die. I cleaned out his cage, fresh food, fresh water. He seemed OK when he was running around in his ball. Then I put him back in his cage, he stuffed his cheeks with food, and then spit it back out. And started acting weird again. I read something online that said that the cedar chips in his cage might cause him to have respiratory problems, and maybe there's something wrong with his food...it might be old or something... I'm gonna try getting him some different bedding and new food and see what happens. He is like freakin' 4 years old though!!! They're only supposed to live like 2-3 years. I'm not taking him ...

Suck It Up That's my new mantra. SUCK IT UP! I can be quite the whiny baby, quite the princess, etc, etc, etc. Ray Ray always teases me about the way I complain and "cry" at the gym, and if I could just suck it up I might be able to do "grown man" workouts. Today he told me I'm the "toughest baby" he knows. I like that. And I like learning to just "suck things up" instead of "crying" about it. I have an oral presentation in one of my classes that I got out of doing by telling the professor how terrified of public speaking I am, but now I've decided I'm going to suck it up. It's only three minutes of shaking and sweaty palms. I can deal with that, right? This week has had it's good points and bad points so far. I haven't really felt like posting lately. I'm not sure what it is. I had a really hard test, I took Monday off from work, I had two great "grown man" workouts, Josh is annoying me, my mom...

"Home, home on the range . . . " Home from work again. I have a huge project due tomorrow that, of course, I've been procrastinating on. It's funny, I've been taking days off from work to catch up with school, and then I take days off from school because I'm so freakin' TIRED! From what? I'm not sure. I've just been wanting to sleep all day. Then I take a nap, can't sleep at night, stay up late playing Space Colony, and then I'm screwed the next day because I need another nap. I started off in good form this morning though. Got up, took Gabby to school, went and did cardio on an empty stomach (I read recently that you can trick your body into burning more fat if you work out on an empty stomach, but whatever I read didn't say how to remedy feelings of passing out from being hypoglycemic!), and now I've caught up on blog reading. Next goal is to stay motivated and not nap. I need to clean my car out, take out all the trash, and clean...

Crappy Day I have been having the worst day, no the worst week, no the worst month . . . I'm sure you get it. I don't know what's going on with me, but I need to figure it out. I'm feeling much better though. I just got off the phone with Jess. Everyone should send her a nice little note. I was talking to her on the phone right as she was entering into her dog sitting duties . I could hear the dogs barking on the phone before she even entered the house. I felt so bad for her. She seemed really flustered as she entered the house saying, "Shhhh, get down . . . Um, I gotta call you back . . . !" I felt really bad for her, but I stilled laughed my ass off!!!

Ray Ray the Savior I truly loved my origianl trainer, Aaron the Beast. He was gorgeous, extremely knowledgeable, and we had a good trainer/trainee relationship, but he could be kind of moody. In a way he was a typical jock, early twenties "punk". Then I got stuck with John Michael the Wimp who I absolutley hated (you can find all this information in previous posts). I realized that I haven't been writing about going to the gym at all lately. I think it's because I truly LOVE my new trainer Ray Ray. He's so freakin' awesome. He's so much fun, so much help, and he's very motivational. He actually makes me want to do better, not only at the gym, but in my whole life. I know that sounds strange. Get a really good trainer like him and maybe you'll understand. He gives me these workouts where I'm throwing a ball around and it feels kind of easy (he does kill me from time to time), but I've been questioning how hard it is that he's actually wo...

"Moody Monday" I seem to be getting lazier and lazier and more and more unmotivated . . . To do ANYTHING!! Too much on my mind? Too many things to do? Who knows . . . but it's getting on my nerves that I don't have the will power to do a dang gone thing! Yesterday as I was driving to pick up Gabby from her dad's house I looked to my right towards where the passenger sideview mirror should be to change lanes and . . . um, it wasn't there, or at least it was just hanging there!!! DAMN IT!!! Some freakin' idiot hit my mirror, bumped by my mirror, or purposely knocked it off!!! I can't believe how inconsiderate people are of other people's property!!! It is completely cracked all around the plastic and sadly hanging on by the little wires that control the mirror! My first car didn't have a passenger side mirror (1976 Datsun 280Z), I never thought that I used that mirror, but now all I do is look over at it and feel very freakin' PISSED off!!! T...

The Emporer's New Groove I started blogging back in July, and I'm still not sure that I have found my groove, and I used to kind of worry and think about it a lot because I'm just neurotic like that, but the bottom line is that I like doing, right? And it doesn't matter what other people think, if they read (although that's a plus, and makes my day), and if I have no clue what I'm rambling about half the time. Jessica got Gabby the movie Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory for her birthday. I might be stealing it and watching it a lot when Gabby's not here though. Too bad I'm not back in high school, when getting high or doing acid or something, and then sitting down to watch this movie would be so much fun. Now, I think I will make a cup of hot tea with milk and sugar and curl up in my bed. How things have changed!!!

All Mighty Mouth This is what my daughter turning seven has brought me. Her mouth and the attitude that comes out of it has been driving me insane! I realize she's just trying to test me and all situations around her, but some this has got to stop! On her birthday she was opening her presents and not being very excited. She seemed almost bored. She opened up her Sponge Bob movie and just kind of looked at it. I asked her if she was having fun and if she liked her presents. She responded first with a huge SIGH! And I was thinking, "You ungrateful spoiled little child!" But at the end of her sigh and after a pause she said, "You are the most awesome Mom ever!!!" Which then of course led me to crying on the spot! I have the most awesome KID EVER!!! My weekends without Gabby seem like nothing short of complete debauchery. I need to find something else that will occupy my time and make me happy. Staying out all night, drinking, being around people I don...

Happy Birthday, Gabby! Today is my daughter's birthday. She will officially be 7-years old at 3:42 pm. I got out of work early today (surprise surprise) so I could run around picking up more presents, cake, etc. Nothing has gone as planned. I stayed too long in Target, but got lots of cool stuff for her. I saw this keyboard, and thought, "Gabby would LOVE that!", and then instantaneously I thought, "My EARS!!!" But, it's her day, and I can't wait to see her bright brown eyes light up, so I bought it anyways. I went to the grocery store to pick up a cake and a bouquet of balloons. Somehow I forgot about the balloons, and on my way home, I had to make an emergency stop, at the stop light, before I sailed through an intersection of traffic, I forgot all about the cake, and the stupid thing went flying onto the passenger floor!!! Remarkably it's still in relatively good shape - just smushed up against the packaging on one side, and missing frosting from ...

The Very Expensive, All Day Affair My new glasses. I'm not sure I like the little silver things at the corners, but I'm getting used to them.

My new sunglasses. Shut up, Jess!!! I know they're not much different from my old ones!!! 

IPEX Have you heard of this IPEX thing from Victoria's Secret. It's being billed as "the world's most advanced bra". Could someone tell me please what exactly the most advanced bra should do?? I just don't get it, and I think it's really funny to think about little men in white coats trying to figure out how to get the world's most advanced bra. I had a massage done last night with my "New Age" massage therapist. I feel so much better. My shoulders aren't as tense, but she doesn't give nice little relaxing massages. She basically beats the shit out of you. I'm sure if I looked at my back in the mirror it would be completely bruised. I just got home from spending a fortune and 2 hours getting new glasses, but I desperately need them. The price of glasses is ridiculous. Of course, I guess I didn't really need to get the Anne Klein frames. I can't wait to go pick them up. I'll try to post pictures.